What does Love Look Like?

 

 

Being in college, it is almost mandatory to find your "soul mate." It's been told that college is when you find your spouse so many of us are searching for the one. When searching for the one we must know exactly what love looks like. We always hear verse 1 Corinthian 13:4-7 on what love is and sadly it has even become cliché. But in this blog we are going to do a case study on it and take a deeper look at the verse. The amplified version puts it like this

 

^"4 Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.

⁵ It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].

⁶ It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail.

⁷ Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]."

 

Before we break down the verse, we must understand what God created love to be. The word love can be properly defined in terms of action, attitude, and behavior. In 1 Corinthians 13, Paul didn't give us a theoretical definition of love but rather a list of things love exemplifies so we can be aware of it when we see it. Now, back to the verse. It starts with love endures (stand no matter what hardships comes our way) long. Love is willing to wait for long periods of time through suffering for the one it cares about which causes it to be patient. Love is kind, it is gentle and cares about the person and their well being. Love isn't envious nor filled with jealousy. Jealousy implies to being displeased with the success of others. Yet, true love desires the success of others. Love is not boastful; it's not big-headed but rather big-hearted. Love is not conceited, it is selfless not selfish. Love is not rude. There are some Christians who seem to take delight in being blunt, justifying it with being "honesty." They will say, “I’m just telling it like it is.” But love doesn’t always tell it like it is; it doesn’t always verbalize all its thoughts, especially if those thoughts don’t build others up. There is a graciousness in love which never forgets that courtesy. Love doesn't seek its own; it is not worried about winning or being the best, love doesn't worry about its own selfish wants. Love is not easily provoked. It is slow to become annoyed and refuses to let other's under their skin. Love isn't a "bookkeeper" of wrong things done to it. That causes hatred and animosity to build up and that is not a characteristic of love. Love takes no joy in any evil or unrighteousness. Love rejoices when the truth prevails. It loves the exposure of what is right. Love bears all things, which means it "covers up" or "protects" what it loves. Love believes all things, it gives the person it loves the benefit of the doubt. Love hopes all things, love is a big believer. Love endures all things, love holds it position at all cost.
Reflecting off that, we see this kind of love through Jesus Christ. he is patient with us, even when we sin and he waits for us years and years until we turn to Him. He is kind and gentle, when we need Him, He is always there holding us and letting us know He is Lord and he will take care of our problems. He is not jealous when we love other people because love is an spiritual gift that we received through Him and when we love we bring glory to His name. He isn't boastful; he doesn't rub in our face that He took up our cross when He didn't have to. He doesn't think of Himself, but rather He thinks of our wellbeing. He is slow to anger and doesn't keep a record of the wrong we have done to Him; he forgives.  He doesn't find excitement in our suffering, when we suffer so does He. He rejoices when we learn the gospel because it is the truth. he covers us up and protects us. He sees the best in us and hopes nothing but good upon our life. He stands firm in his relationship with us and never gives up.
Now, look at the person you're interested in. Do they love you like Jesus does? If not why are you with them? God has prepared someone for you that will love you like Jesus. Jesus love for us is different than any love. Jesus has an agape love. Agape means selfless love of one person for another without sexual implications (especially love that is spiritual in nature.) Humans can't love like this because we are sinful by nature. We have selfishness somewhere in us. When we love, we don't love perfectly; we love with a phileo love. Phileo means brotherly love; affection. We see the difference in these two types of love in Acts. Jesus asked Peter 3 times if he loved him. John 21:15-17 states

 “Jesus asked, "do you agapao me?"
Peter replied, "I phileo you."

  Jesus asked, "do you agapao me?"
Peter replied, "I phileo you."

 Jesus asked, "do you phileo me?"
Peter replied, "I phileo you."

Jesus was asking him does he love him with all his heart, but Peter in some manuscripts says Peter was grieved and replied back "Lord you know everything; You know that I love You [that I have a deep, instinctive, personal affection for You, as for a close friend]." As humans, that's all we can offer others, a deep emotional based love. But when we ask God for his love and to love others like He does we begin to love them the way 1 Corinthians 13 describes love.

A lot of you are in a relationship where you have phileo love, but God wants to give you a spouse who will agape love you through their agape love given from Jesus Christ. I pray that God will show each and everyone of you what true love is, through Himself first, the church, your family and friends and then through a special significant other.

Stay Blessed!~